Well, first of all I want to thank someone for something that she sent me in the mail. Susan Sanders sent me a beautifully written card and a CD of Scripture read by Holly Wagner with music. I haven't listened to it yet because I just received it a few minutes ago in the mail, but I definitely will listen to it and its words of Scripture. Thank you Susan, you have been a good friend and I love you.

And secondly I've received some sad news just a moment ago. My brother Danny called from Virginia. He called to tell me that Janice my sister-in-law's father had died. I don't know, but it seems to me that she is being tested beyond what any human should be. She's also has been fighting long and hard to overcome her cancer. She watched as her parents became unable to stay home alone, and so she had to put them in an assisted living home. That was so hard on her, she cried many tears over it. No person wants to be the one that puts the parents in a nursing home, or an assisted living home. It takes strength beyond strength to do it. But we all know that such things has to be. And now today, this morning at around six clock a.m. her father dies. I don't know how much strength Janice has, but I pray to God, He will be there for her. Sometimes we need more than that physical arm to lean on. My brother Danny as always been there for her to lean on, but I myself know that sometimes that's not quite enough. We need to lean on their Lord and Savior Jesus Christ to comfort our very souls. I pray that he will be there for Janice to comfort her, as she goes through the next few days.
I ask you all please keep Janice and her family in your prayers. Keep Janice's mother in your prayers also, she loved her husband dearly and will miss him tremendously. Janice's father was a Christian, and I'm so glad of that, because we know that he's in the arms of Jesus. Janice also has to be in Duke hospital next week for chemo. Dear Lord Jesus be there with her and for her, is my prayer.
Continue praying for Willard and me as I start my treatments next week.'' Hopefully that is''.
Until next time, God bless and God save.

During my consultation with Dr. Zagar yesterday, he explained about the treatment that I would undergo. He will be using a treatment called cyber knife on my tumor. He explained that this treatment although effective is also dangerous because of the high radiation. He said that he could puncture holes in my bladder or intestines and that I could be ending up with two bags. He also said that it was possible that a hip may be broken, I told him if he broke my hip, I would break his. At that he laughed and said that was a deal.
My sister-in-law Janice Moore had sent me some information on Cyber knife a few weeks ago which was very informative, but I lost it. However I have gone on the Internet and found some information. Here it is.
The CyberKnife Robotic Radiosurgery System is a non-invasive alternative to surgery for the treatment of both cancerous and non-cancerous tumors anywhere in the body, including the prostate, lung, brain, spine, liver, pancreas and kidney. The treatment – which delivers beams of high dose radiation to tumors with extreme accuracy – offers new hope to patients worldwide.
Though its name may conjure images of scalpels and surgery, the CyberKnife treatment involves no cutting. In fact, the CyberKnife System is the world’s first and only robotic radiosurgery system designed to treat tumors throughout the body non-invasively. It provides a pain-free, non-surgical option for patients who have inoperable or surgically complex tumors, or who may be looking for an alternative to surgery.

So there we go, that's all I know to tell you. Please keep Willard and me in your prayers. Just a reminder, it's just as hard on family members of cancer patients as it is the patient themselves. Although the family members are not sick, they still have to go through all the doctor appointments, fears, anxieties and everything else. They need prayers just as much as the patient themselves.
Until next time, God bless and God save.

Not the best news.

Well, they did not give me a radiation treatment today. My tumor has gone from 2 cm to somewhere between 4 1/2 and 5 cm. More than doubling in size. Dr. Varia who was going to give me radiation, after seeing the size of the tumor called in another Dr. a Dr. Zagar. Both doctors agreed that my tumor is now far to large to do traditional radiation. They did implant the trackers{the little gold seeds} today. I am to go back tomorrow for an MRI and to have a conference with Dr. Zagar.
Willard, the man that has stood beside me strong, broke down for the first time in front of me today. I'm sure he has broke down and cried many times when I could not see him. But today he said, the disappointment in my face when he first saw me was more than he could stand.
Please keep us in your prayers as I know you will. We both send our love far and wide to all of you. Until next time, God bless and God save.

A red cat's eye marble.

You remember not long ago I told you about my uncle David. Uncle David meant a lot to me, and I never will forget the kindness he showed me as a child. A red Cat's Eye Marble. Yes a Red Cat's Eye Marble. Such a very simple thing, but something that made a little girl's face light up every time she saw it. Now I've got you wondering, what in the world, don't I? Well you see, when I was around 8 years old as many children did, I would play marbles with the neighboring kids. I had a red cat's eye Marble, and to a 8-year-old Girl that red cat's eye marble was a beautiful thing, and I thought a lot of it. I decided to give that red cat's eye marble to my uncle David, so it would remind him of me when he saw it. Uncle David said he would always keep it in his change pocket, and that way when he pulled his change out of his pocket, he would see that red marble and think of me. Every time uncle David came to visit, he would pull that red marble out of his pants pocket to show me that he still had it.
That meant the world to me. I'm telling you this story because I want to remind you that children are very impressionable, children remember. They remember the wrong things you do to them, and they remember the nice things that you do for them. A little act such as keeping an object that a child gives to you may mean the world to them. While it may not mean much to you. And too, the same could go 'I guess' for adults. I still have small trinkets in my drawer where people have given me out of love. And every time I look at them, I remember the love that me and that person shared.
I know once I'm gone, it will be trash to whoever cleans my drawers out. But all those little trinkets mean the world to me.
Until next time, God bless and God save.

Another one. lol

I have finally finished sewing this quilt top together. It has took me well over a month. I used to be able to do something like this in 2 to 3 days. I am really trying to boost my energy level, but it's slow. I am going to get there with the Lord's help. Now comes the job of putting it together and quilting it.
All in all I consider myself very blessed to be where I am today, considering all that I've been through. And still I think about all the others having such hard times. I think about the ones that did not make it. As I say, I am so very blessed. I start my radiation treatments the first part of May, please keep me in your prayers, that all will go well.
Until next time, God bless and God save.

If you'll remember yesterday, I was talking about the books that God keeps. It reminded me of something that happened in the nursing home years ago. This elderly woman," Elsie Norris" was a resident at the time. She was in a vegetative state and did not speak or move. Her husband was there with her every day. He spent many hours each day with her. The love that he showed her was just incredible. One Sunday morning as Willard and I were there to give the Sunday school lesson, Mr. Norris walked over to me and asked me if I would mind reading one of his wife's poem's as his trembling hands held the subject book full of his wife's writings, I took it from him, went and set down with it. I went through the book to find a poem to read, I read it over silently before I was to read it aloud. What was in the pages of that book touched my heart. You see, the book not only had poems in it, it also had letters to God. I picked a poem to read and read it during the Sunday school lesson. Ms. Elsie had the most beautiful smile on her face as I was reading the poem that she had written most likely many years before. After the Sunday school lesson I talked to Mr. Norris about the book. He said that he had a box full of them at home. He told me that each day his wife would write a poem or a letter to God. Think about it, every day that sweet woman would sit down and write either a poem to God or a letter to God. She has left those prayers and poems for her husband and her children to read. Her children can now read those writings and see how much their mother loved God.
Ms. Elsie died about three years ago. Mr. Norris doesn't come into the nursing home anymore. I don't know what ever happened to him, but I know he must still miss his wife tremendously. I pray that God will comfort him during his lonely hours.
Can you imagine leaving something like that for your husband, your children and even your grandchildren to read long after your death? Quite an extraordinary woman she must've been.
Until next time, God bless and God save.

Books

Did you know that God keeps books? Psalms 56:8 You tell my wanderings: put you my tears into your bottle: are they not in your book? There's no telling how many books that God keeps. We know that God keeps a book and in it, the record of our sins, and then erases those sins from its pages once we accept Jesus as our Redeemer. We know that there is a book titled Lamb's book of life. In this book are written the names of all that have excepted Jesus Christ, as Lord, as Redeemer, as Savior. And I guess you might say that, that is the most important book of all. You can believe that there's more than one way to heaven, but friend let me tell you this. If your name is not written in that Lamb's book of life the gates of heaven will not open for you. Jesus said"
John 14:6
Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me."
Now I have read the Bible through and through many times, and never in my reading or my studying of the Bible have I ever found any place where Jesus lied. So Jesus says he's the only way unto the father, the father being in heaven, and I repeat, if Jesus is not your Lord then the gates will remain closed. It is getting nearer and nearer for Jesus' promised arrival in the clouds. Where all his disciples will meet him in the air. We'll have brand-new bodies that will never hurt or never die again. We will be with our Savior Jesus Christ forevermore. Search your souls to make sure that you're ready for His arrival.
Until next time, God bless and God save.